OK Magazine: Still Hates Woman

OK Magazine: continuing it's policy of woman-shaming.

I'm not surprised OK Magazine ran this cover. 

I'm angry. Sad. Depressed. Mostly angry. How dare they treat a woman like this. It doesn't matter what woman because none of us deserve this.

I am surprised at how many people seem shocked by OK Mag running this as their cover. It's not like OK Mag ever write anything positive about women.  All of their articles are about women being too fat fat, too skinny, too promiscuous, too orange, too stupid, too smart, too woman. Just like most women's magazines.

Women's magazines make their money making women feel insecure. They don't care about women's health or happiness: just the money.

We need to boycott them all.

We need to start developing magazines aimed at women which don't engage in women-blaming and women-hating. 

No woman should ever be shamed for her body. Ever.

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Louise Mensch is a professional troll but why do we find her so surprising.

I genuinely don't know what to say about Louise Mensch anymore. I know she is a troll by profession but her recent tweets have been shocking. At least, I've always assumed she was a professional troll, along with Dr. Christian, but I am at a loss for words to describe her recent tweeting. If she were a friend, I would be worried about her. I cannot decide if she's actually quite dim with moments of brilliance or if she genuinely lacks the empathy to even attempt to understand the lives of people who aren't wealthy and white like her.

The idea that George Zimmerman should be thankful for the imminent birth of the "royal baby" demonstrates such a lack of awareness of reality that I'm gobsmacked. How can anyone living in the US think of the Zimmerman acquittal in positive terms? A child is dead, dead because of racism and utterly insane laws about "standing your ground", and Mensch is blithering on about the birth of a child in a country that she no longer lives in.* 

As for "rape fantasy porn" tweets, I can't believe any woman could be so dismissive of the experiences of sexual violence of other women. Mensch is engaged in that old skool narcissistic twitter tendency to retweet everyone who agrees with them and ignore the comments by those who disagree. Her replies to those expressing concern are dismissive and, frequently, rude as though survivors of sexual violence aren't worth her time. 

I loathe the term "rape porn". Rape, by definition, is a non-consensual act. It is impossible for consensual porn to be made about rape. As for Mensch's assertion that most women have "rape porn" fantasies, well, I'd like to see her research to back up the statistic because I think it's complete twaddle. What really shocked me was Mensch stating she would blog about the "rape porn" debates AFTER she blogs about the royal baby. How skewed are her priorities if the potential birth of one child is more important than legislation dealing with pornography and sexual violence? I know she's hardly the only person blithering on as if we are witnessing the birth of the new Messiah but her tweets shocked me.

I suppose I shouldn't be surprised at what Mensch tweets or blogs since she is clearly in it for the attention and the best way to get attention in our culture is by being utterly ridiculous. This is just another dimension of our reality television based culture which grants those engaged in self-destructive behaviour with fame and columns in national papers. Instead of publishing actual news, our national media has spent the day stalking a hospital where one woman is giving birth in a denial of her right to privacy and at the expense of reporting information which is important.

It is a sad indictment of our culture that Louise Mensch, who resigned as an MP to live in the US with her new husband, is still considered an important political commentator on our culture.


A selection of her tweets on the murder of Trayvon Martin

People most thankful for #royalbaby - George #Zimmerman and his family. 

Should #Zimmerman have followed #Trayvon, no. Did Trayvon have right to attack, yes. Previous statement still applies. Not guilty. #tcot 

In the end #Zimmerman defence & acquittal very simple, backed by forensics; #Trayvon attacked, GZ feared for his life, shot him. Not guilty 

George #Zimmerman wasn't on trial for being a puffed-up vigilante. He was on trial for murder 2 & the President should not have intervened.

Her tweets on the debate over "rape fantasy" porn

I would hope that any such law would be challenged in the courts and fail in the courts. It is inhuman. Rape and rape fantasy not the same. 

It is not for our government to police consensual simulation, between adults, of one of women's most common fantasies. 

It's not law yet and I hope it never will be. The Simon Walsh Obscenity trial should give all MPs pause. Govt out of people's bedrooms. 

Going to blog on opposition to government seeking to criminalise simulation one of most common female fantasies, rape, but after #royalbaby

* I know insane is not the right word to use here. I apologise for the ableist term. I'm just so angry that I can't work out what to say.

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JumpMag: For Real Girls [which means all girls]

JumpMag is a brilliant piece of online feminist activism. It's a magazine aimed at preteen girls whose motto [coined by one of the girls] is Fluff free and Bieberless. It makes me smile every time I see it. The founder and editor, Lynn Schrieber, who is an utterly fabulous feminist, started JumpMag as a way to fight the ever increasing number of pink and sparkly magazines which were basically one giant advertisement.* JumpMag is just one of the myriad of ways feminists are reclaiming the internet and making it a safe space for our daughters.

It is an utterly fabulous feminist project.

There are lots of posts written by adults covering every topic imaginable but, to be honest, those aren't the best pieces on the site [and I say that as a contributor]. The best part of JumpMag is the section written by girls themselves. There are short stories, personal stories of feminist activism, book reviews and poems. The posts written by young girls are amazing. So many talented and brilliant young girls sharing just inspiring and powerful pieces of writing.** 

I'm at RadFem2013 this weekend sharing a space with an incredible number of brilliant, beautiful, brave and inspiring women. We're getting together to discuss, debate and share.  JumpMag offers that space to preteen girls. It doesn't matter how individual women label their personal feminism, there is nothing more important than sisterhood and solidarity. JumpMag offers this to preteen girls. 

JumpMag is run entirely by Lynn and takes in no advertising revenue. All contributors are volunteers. It's my kind of anti-capitalist, pro-sisterhood feminism.***

*Okay, it's entirely possible this post constitutes a paid advertisement since Lynn is a friend and she bought me coffee once but this is me not actually caring about impartiality. 

** Technically, my daughter wrote one of the pieces but I'm totally impartial about this bit.

*** I suspect Lynn is rolling her eyes at me here!

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Louise Mensch is a Nincompoop: where I ignore my rules about Feminism

Technically, this blogpost will violate all of my personal rules on feminism and not participating in attacking women for being women. I don't want to do this but I'm not entirely sure how to write about Louise Mensch without declaring her a nincompoop. Twice this week, Mensch has come out with statements which demonstrate both an incredible lack of awareness of reality and a complete refusal to even attempt to understand privilege or intersectionality.

The first statement this week basically implied that most people who are depressed just need to exercise more. Now, there is some correlation between exercise and dealing with depression but to suggest that most depressed people just need to exercise more is just offensive. It ignores the realities of depression and mental illness. I could honestly rant about this for hours but, fundamentally, Mensch's comment is further demonstration of her complete disconnect from the lives of most women. 

Mensch's second foray into nincompoopery this week was another blogpost on intersectionality which, unfortunately, was cross-posted in the Guardian. It is yet another whiny piece about how intersectionality is a big scary word that is too difficult to understand. I am so bored of these blogposts. Intersectionality isn't difficult. Most small children understand multiple oppressions. They may not have the language skills to articulate it but your average primary aged child can figure it out for themselves. Why middle class white feminists seem to be stuck on this "it's too difficult" record is beyond me. Yes some feminists may not have come across it before but 2 minutes on google would make it fairly clear what it was.

Intersectionality and "check your privilege" have both been used as silencing tactics but that doesn't make them irrelevant. It just means that a group of aggressive whiners have deliberately misunderstood the terms in order to find more things to tantrum about. Personally, I've taken to ignoring them. Why waste your time on women trying to silence other women? I wasn't going to reply to Mensch's article because I do think she's an attention-seeking troll and we should be ignoring her rather indulging her self-important dramatics had she not referenced Laurie Penny's tweet about Ron Liddle's racism. 

Laurie Penny tweeted out the phrase "don't feed the trolls" in reference to Ron Liddle's deeply offensive Spectator piece this week. I retweeted it because I agreed with her. Comedian Ava Vidal tweeted Penny to point out that a white woman telling WOC to ignore racism was a silencing tactic. Like Penny, this had not occurred to me. I do believe that feeding trolls is wrong but to not call out racism is equally wrong. We need to work harder at not feeding trolls whilst simultaneously calling out racism, misogyny, disablism, classism etc. There is a balance. I've not figured it out yet but I'm trying. 

I disagree with Penny on lots of issues but one thing Penny does is apologise.  For that, she's one of my favourite feminists. There seems to be this theory that women apologising is a sign of weakness to be avoided at all costs. Being wrong isn't a bad thing. Being wrong doesn't make you a bad feminist. It means you made a mistake or simply didn't see your privilege. Apologising is a feminist action. We need more feminists like Penny who are willing to step up publicly and admit they were wrong. 

According to Mensch, Penny's apology was a sign of weakness; a desperate attempt to be one of the 'cool kids'.  When did we get to a point where apologising was wrong? Surely, a fundamental tenant of feminism is that we are all learning from one another and will, inevitably, make mistakes? Mistakes are a part of the learning process; as is apologising. 

According to Mensch, feminists are spending too much time discussion oppression and, as such, are making male feminists sad. :( Here's a handy tip about "male feminists": if they stop listening to women because they are bored, they aren't actually feminists. I know that sounds difficult, like intersectionality, but the whole point of feminism is that we listen and learn from one another. If men don't like it, well, that's just male privilege for you; just as white, wealthy women ignoring the opinions of WOC is white privilege. 

I could spend more time explaining privilege and intersectionality but Mensch isn't going to listen. She's far too busy being smug and rich and white and arrogant. 

These are some of the excellent responses to Mensch's Guardian article:

The Debate: Check Your Privilege, Louise Mensch at Black Feminists

Intersectionality - Round V at Black Feminists

Intersectionality for Dummies at Black Feminists

Here's Some Reality For Ya at It's Not a Zero Sum Game

Standing on the Shoulders of Giants by Renie D Lodge

Louise Mensch - Take A Lesson on Privilege from the Internet by Laurie Penny

Being a Mentalist at Put Up with rain

If we checked and apologised for every privilege the world would be a dull monolith but ... at Flying on the Rainbow

Straight Allies, White Anti-Racists, Male Feminists (and Other Labels That Mean Nothing to me) at Spectra Speaks

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Dr Christian: Apparently, he invented twitter.

Dr. Christian Jessen is on yet another misogynistic spree on twitter. He does this frequently as he really, really dislikes it when women challenge his knowledge. I first came across him nearly 18 months ago on twitter. I knew about his reality TV show but I had never watched it since I think all reality TV is exploitative and hateful. His "Embarrassing Bodies" is up there with Gok Wan on the misogynistic body-shaming stakes.

I would have ignored him completely had a member of Mumsnet not retweeted a particularly nasty comment of Jessen into my twitter feed. Basically, Jessen had called into question the fuckability of women with leg hair. This was, apparently, the appropriate response to a member of Mumsnet tweeting Jessen to point out his information on breast feeeding was incorrect. Jessen was helpfully suggesting that breastfeeding "ruined" women's breasts. Ignoring, the misogynistic body-shaming in that statement, it's actually also not true. The rapid weight gain and loss during pregnancy changes the shape of women's breasts. There is also research that suggests that breast-feeding helps women retain the shape of their breasts but, actually, that bit is irrelevant.

Dr. Christian took to twitter to make factually incorrect statements about breast-feeding and dismissed the women questioning him as unfuckable due to their leg hair.

He then proceed to suggest that breastfeeding was kind of creepy, which is also not exactly a pro-woman stance. A pro-woman stance on infant feeding is to ensure that women have all the correct information and support so that they can then choose the option which works best for themselves and their baby. Suggesting breast-feeding makes women unfuckable by ruining their breasts is misogyny.

Now, I totally would have ignored him as yet another obvious misogynistic troll had Jessen not gone to suggest that the women questioning him were "hysterical". As you can imagine, I did not take kindly to that suggestion.

Nor did I find Jessen's suggestion that we should thank him for giving us a platform in which to air our views.

Because Jessen, clearly, invented both twitter and the internet.

Because without Jessen us poor "girls" (as he dismissively refers to us) couldn't possibly have a public platform in which to discuss our views.

Like, say, the internet.

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Dear Cannes Film Festival, Roman Polanski is a Child Rapist.

 Dear Cannes Film Festival,

Roman Polanski is a child rapist.

I know I've written this exact same letter before, although last time it was to the British Film Institute. I'm sure you are bored of hearing this. I'm certainly finding writing this over and over and over again somewhat tedious but people seem to be struggling with this issue. Still.

So, for the record, Roman Polanski is a convicted child rapist who is also a fugitive from justice.

It doesn't matter how many "good" films he makes, or how many stupid people make excuses for him because he's an "artiste", Roman Polanski will always be a convicted child rapist.

Roman Polanski gave a 13 year old a quaalude in champagne and then vaginally, orally and anally raped her.

I know Polanski has trouble understanding the fact that raping children is a despicable crime for which he should still be in prison. After all, there are no end of rape apologists telling him that it was completely okay for him to rape a child [see: the entire audience the night he won the Oscar for the Pianist].

There is a reason he's blithering on about equality for women being a bad thing and the birth control pill "ruining romance". Polanski does not want to take responsibility for the child he was convicted of raping nor does he want anyone to question the clearly illegal sexual relationship he had with Natassja Kinski when she was only 15 years old.

Every single person who pays to see Polanski's films is supporting rape culture.

Every single actor who appears in a Polanski film is supporting rape culture.

Every single organisation that gives Polanski awards for his films is supporting rape culture.

Every single person who uses the word "historical" to refer to Polanski's rape conviction is supporting rape culture.

Every journalist who does not mention Polanski's conviction for rape is supporting rape culture.

Roman Polanski is a child rapist who fled from California because he did not want to go to prison.

Roman Polanski gave a 13 year old a quaalude in champagne and then vaginally, orally and anally raped her.

He should be in prison; not receiving awards at your Festival.

Louise Pennington

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Posted in #celebrityculture, #rapeculture, Child Rape, Male Violence Against Women, Misogyny, Rape Culture, Roman Polanski, Violence against Women, War on Women | No comments

#DickheadDetox: Aaron Carter's #tipsforgirls

Aaron Carter, the Dude internationally reknown as the little brother of some other dude from some boyband from way back when, has taken to twitter to reveal his dating #tipsforgirls.

Bless his cotton socks, these are the pearls of wisdom from The Younger Brother of What's His Pickle:

Aaron Carter ‏@AARONCARTER16h Confident woman are sexy to any man. Don't pretend to be someone your not just to please a man. #TipsForGirls 

Aaron Carter ‏@AARONCARTER17h Be Approachable- men don't like rejection- a woman with an attitude to her look will scare a man away. #tipsforgirls 

Aaron Carter ‏@AARONCARTER17h A woman's appearance is a weapon to attracting a man- always look your best ( neatness, clothes,hair ,makeup,scent,etc... #tipsforgirls

I can not think Aaron enough for bringing these pearls to our attention, sometimes I actually forget that we live in a culture where women's value is based entirely on their ability to pass the Patriarchal Fuckability Test. I forget that women's intelligence and love is completely irrelevant unless they are white, blonde,  and thin. I forget that women have to ensure that their behaviour and appearance are pleasing at all times. God forbid, we hurt men's feelings but not actually wanting to fuck them. 

We must always be approachable; even when we don't want to be approached because men's feelings are more important than women's safety and bodily autonomy.

Some genius has suggested that Aaron write a book about his #tipsforgirls. No one try to dissuade him from this policy; just imagine the hilarity it would cause on twitter.

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The Onion's Chris Brown "Joke"

I'm not going to link to the Onion article on Chris Brown's break-up with Rihanna. Frankly, they've gotten more than enough ad revenue off yesterday's article entitled "Heartbroken Chris Brown Always Thought Rihanna Was Woman He'd Beat To Death". It's a hateful piece and there is no justification whatsoever for "jokes" about domestic violence and the murder of a woman.

I'm angry someone wrote that piece.

I'm angry that the Onion saw fit to publish it.

I'm angry that there are white feminists "defending" this piece. 

I doubt very much the Onion would have published a piece like this if the victim of violence was white.

I doubt very much the Onion would have published a piece like this if the perpetrator was white.

This isn't about misogyny, and the Onion has some serious form for pretending misogyny is 'funny', this is also about racism.

Rihanna has the right to live her life in privacy without being publicly humiliated and blamed for being a victim of domestic violence.

By all means, call Chris Brown out on his violence but not like this. Don't resort to malicious "jokes".

Male violence is all too frequently ignored, minimised and elided under the guise of "humour". How many women have to die before we stop pretending domestic violence is funny?

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Gwyneth Paltrow, Goop and the Inability to Separate the Personal from the Political

I got rather excited when I came across this article by Annette Bourdeau in the Huffington Post entitled: "10 Actresses I'd Rather See in the IronMan Suit". Silly me. I thought it was an Ironman reboot idea with a woman as IronMan. 

I was wrong.

It was just another, incredibly unsubtle, personal attack on Gwyneth Paltrow. Now, I'm not a fan of Gwyneth Paltrow as an actress. This is simply because I don't happen to enjoy the types of films she appears in. In fact, the only movies I have enjoyed in which Paltrow appears are the IronMan franchise and the Avengers. I'm a huge fan of  superhero movies and not-so-much the Hollywood version of the 'arthouse film'. With the exception of the films Hook, Seven and Shakespeare in Love, I genuinely can't name another film Paltrow has been in. 

I'm also not a fan of Goop. It is beyond ridiculous. It fails to acknowledge the reality of the lives of women who are not wealthy and white. It represents everything I loathe about our capitalist-patriarchal culture. I can not accurately define my hatred for Goop and the heteronormative, white, rich, and consumerist construction of a reality it endorses which is unachievable by 98% of the planet who don't have servants and nannies and are unable to spend 10 hours a day at the gym working on their upper arms. This ignores the frankly dangerous "healthy eating" advice in both Goop and the spin-off "cookbook".

However, I equally dislike the personal nature of the attacks on Paltrow. Granted she has form for making statements which are remarkably lacking in self-awareness but that is hardly shocking for someone as privileged as Paltrow. Her inability to understand the reality the rest of us live in is a problem but insulting Paltrow won't change that. Yes, she needs to take some personal responsibility for her own comments but, really, she's hardly responsible the body in which she was born. Paltrow is hardly responsible for being placed on the cover of People Magazines notoriously misogynistic '50 Most Beautiful People' edition.

I get that Annette Bourdeau hates Paltrow but phrases like 'smug mug' are waltzing into the territory commonly referred to as misogyny. Goop deserves all the criticism it gets. Paltrow deserves criticism for her, generally ridiculous, statements and her inability to see her privilege but we need to focus our criticism on her actions and words and not reinforce the misogyny of our capitalist-patriarchy by using misogynistic language to denigrate the work of a talented actress. 

Goop is the problem. 

The capitalist-patriarchy is the problem.

Our heteronormative, white supremacist culture is the problem.

We need to focus our anger on them and not waste time in personal attacks. 

Personal attacks on other women achieve nothing.

We need to call Paltrow out on her lack of awareness of her privilege but in a manner which does not involve misogynistic language and abuse.

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