I Want To Go: RadFem Rise-Up! in Toronto

Another Radical Feminist conference and more threats of violence. I'd love to be in Toronto for the RadFem Rise-Up this weekend as I do believe in the importance of women-only organising to discuss issues which uniquely effect womyn-born. I believe all oppressed groups have the right to self-organisation. There are many issues, particularly male violence, which harm us all, however the right of groups to self-organise remains fundamental. We can support one another in campaigns whilst simultaneously acknowledging the right of others to organise and campaign without us.

The level of threats levelled at radical feminists who choose to self-organise is both distressing and a clear indication of how afraid the patriarchy is of us. RadFem 2012 and 2013 in London had to change venues because of threats of physical violence and harassment by men. Yet, somehow, a group of womyn-born is so frightening that other feminists actually supported the men who threatened us.  I genuinely cannot get my head around the idea of women supporting MRAs in trying to silence other women. Surely if there is one common enemy all oppressed groups have, it is violent men.?

This is a statement from conference organisers:

Despite hundreds of threats of death and violence directed at women and at the venue staff, the RadFem Riseup conference IS GOING FORWARD. We are having a great time with some wonderful women, gearing up for a day of presentations and strategy tomorrow. For every threat of violence we receive, another woman wakes up to the reality of the situation. Every death threat strengthens our resolve. We will not be prevented from meeting. We will not be prevented from organizing. We will not be prevented from rising up.

We need to stand up and support our sisters who are being threatened with violence by men. We need to support our sisters voices, even if we don't agree with them. Feminism can achieve nothing as a movement unless we start focussing on male violence and the silencing tactics by MRAs. Collusion with men who silence women only supports the Patriarchy.

I can't be in Toronto but I wish all the participants a wonderful and supportive conference.

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Apparently, "my politics" are the problem: Mumsnet, Vagenda and Feminism

I've been struggling to write a proper response to Holly Baxter's guest blog for Mumsnet. I remain incredibly saddened that Mumsnet chose to run this particular blogpost by Holly Baxter from Vagenda as part of the 16 Days of Activism on VAW.* I am unhappy that they linked my bloghop, which I intended to be a celebration of women's voices, with a blog post which erases women from the feminist movement. I am annoyed that they locked the thread on the blog post where many of us were raising our concerns. I am disappointed that they dismissed our concerns as irrelevant to the point where they locked a thread and did not return to it. But, mostly, I am hurt that my concerns have been dismissed because of "my politics", as if my "politics" make me incapable of rational thought. I am hurt that the concerns of other women are also being dismissed. As Lynn Schreiber said when commenting on a draft of this piece "if it is your politics, then it is our politics, as we were just as dismayed and angered by the reaction of Mumsnet."

There really is so much wrong with Baxter's post that it's difficult to know where to start. At best, Baxter's post was extremely naive but, to be honest, I think I am being over-kind with that description. Using the violent murder of 14 women at the Ecole Polytechnique in Montreal in 1989 to start a debate about the role of men within the feminist movement is, simply, offensive. There are valid debates to be had about the role of men in the feminist movement. This was neither the time nor the place.

Baxter compounds this offence by failing to name the 14 women who were murdered.

Geneviève Bergeron, aged 21;
Hélène Colgan, 23;
Nathalie Croteau, 23;
Barbara Daigneault, 22;
Anne-Marie Edward, 21;
Maud Haviernick, 29;
Barbara Maria Klucznik, 31;
Maryse Leclair, 23;
Annie St.-Arneault, 23;
Michèle Richard, 21;
Maryse Laganière, 25;
Anne-Marie Lemay, 22;
Sonia Pelletier, 28; and
Annie Turcotte, aged 21. 

And, that is what is wrong with Holly Baxter's blog. She makes it about the man rather than the women who were murdered. This isn't unusual since this is precisely what the mainstream media does when violent men murder women. But, this isn't a feminist position. It has never been a feminist position. Feminism is a woman-centred movement. 

What Baxter seems to miss is that the man who murdered 14 women for being 'feminists' was never going to be a part of the feminist movement. He was never going to understand that the reason he didn't get into the Canadian airforce or the Ecole Polytechnique was because of his personal failings. Men like that don't respond to reason or constructive discourse. The men who do, the men we want involved in the feminist movement, don't need to be told what to do or have to be in charge. They are already involved although sometimes their 'help' can be of questionable value as seen in the 'Walk a Mile in her Shoes' marches. The point is we don't have to make a special effort to involve those men. If they want to be involved, they will be. Yet, Baxter seems to be implying that if feminists spent more time worrying about the involvement of men in the feminist movement, then men would be less likely to kill us. So, really it's our fault that violent, anti-feminist men kill women they identify as feminists because we aren't nice enough. It's just another form of victim-blaming. 

Frankly, I struggle to take any self-defined feminist who says this seriously: 

But it's important to remember that feminism is about destroying patriarchal assumptions (which, incidentally, include the assumptions that men are naturally aggressive, animalistic and hypersexual - insulting, to say in the least.) It's not about destroying men, or holding innocent men to account for the actions of people who share nothing in common with them except a penis. That's just biblical.

Feminists are already aware that feminism is about destroying patriarchal assumptions. The thing is feminists aren't the ones labelling men as "naturally aggressive, animalistic and hypersexual". That is the position the Patriarchy takes in its efforts to minimise and excuse male behaviour. Jack Layton, one of the co-founders of the White Ribbon Movement in 1991, has been explicit that he was talking about male violence against women. The fact that the White Ribbon Campaign has become gender-neutral is testimony more to the power of those who want to ignore the issue of male violence than it is to men's interest in the feminist movement. The men I know, who support the feminist movement, are more than aware that the vast majority of violence committed against women and children is by men. They know that the vast majority of violence committed against men is by other men. 

Marc Lepine was not an isolated "madman". To imply that ignores the lived realities of billions of women across the world. If Lepine were one isolated man, millions of women each year would not by murdered by men. If Marc Lepine was an "isolated" madman, then we have an epidemic of "isolated" madmen causing devastation and mass murder on an almost daily basis. Or, we could start discussing the reality of male violence and start expecting men to take responsibility for male violence, particularly since there are already men willing to address this issue.

The Massacre at the Polytechnique in Montreal was Canada's Dunblane. This is something that we will never forget. It is something that has changed us all. To conflate it with the issue of men's participation in the feminist movement is, simply, disrespectful. There are very valid discussions to be had about the involvement of men but this isn't the time and it is most certainly not the 'hook' to use to make a cheap political point.


* I am not going to address the personal attack made by Holly Baxter on Dr. Julia Long. Dr. Long has addressed the issue here. What I will say is that Baxter owes Dr. Long an apology and it's telling that despite being factually wrong, Baxter has made no public statement retracting her personal attack.

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Feminism, Men and Women-Only Spaces

The demise of feminism is back in the news again. Carla Bruni-Sarkozy and Katy Perry have both made public statements about how unnecessary feminism is to their personal lives. Suzanne Venker has not only declared feminism dead but claims that there is now a war on men.   Ironically, this death of feminism has coincided with very public demonstrations of feminist activism, as well as increased public debate on the issue of the inclusion of men within the feminist movement. 

Yet, the debate over the inclusion of men within feminism movement has always been important. It has never stopped being important. It has only re-emerged in the mainstream British press due to the backlashto the women-only RadFem 2012 conference in London in June; as well as the no-platforming on the Manchester Women-Up North Conference who chose to have one session for FAAB-women survivors of sexual violence only.

I support women-only spaces. I think they remain fundamental to the success of feminism as a political movement dedicated to the liberation of women. Yet, no one ever seems to ask feminists why they believe women-only spaces are important or why the exclusion of men from *some* feminist events is necessary for revolution. No one asks why feminists are moving back to women-only organising or why feminists are increasingly identifying as political lesbians or lesbian separatists?  Why are women-only spaces, once again, becoming so important? No one asks why there is such a backlash to thought of women-only organising? When people do ask, they don't appear to be hearing the answer.

Whilst the inclusion of men within the movement is necessary, they do not need to be involved at every meeting and conference. There are thousands of ways that men can be, and are, involved with feminist activism that doesn't require them encroaching on women-only spaces. They can help financially support women's organisations like Rape Crisis, Shakti Women's Aid, Women's Aid, Nia, or Southall Black Sisters. Men can join activist groups like Object, UK Feminista, Fawcett Society, and Abortion Rights. Men can fundraise by holding car washes and bake sales. They can join the White Ribbon Campaign and help to raise awareness about male violence against women and children.

The most important thing men can do to help the feminist movement is to challenge sexism every time they witness it. They have to challenge every rape joke. They have to challenge every man who minimises domestic violence. They have to step up every time; not just once in a while but every time they witness sexism. Sometimes this means they have to challenge themselves and recognise that their own behaviour is sexist. Sometimes it means accepting that they won't be allowed into every feminist space. As a white, heterosexual feminist it would be hypocritical of me to demand to be allowed into feminist spaces for Black, Ethnic and Minority Women. It would be equally hypocritical for me to demand entry into a feminist space for lesbians-only, just as it would be hypocritical for me to demand entry into a room of male survivors of sexual violence or testicular cancer. Campaigning for women's liberation to bring about the destruction of the capitalist-patriarchy and the creation of true equality does not mean every person deserves equal access. It means hearing the specific needs of specific groups and taking those into account. Like kindergarten, it's about learning fairness.

We need men in the feminist movement. We need men who understand the real long-term effects of male violence. We need men who listen. We need men who support without dominating. Male domination of speech, both in public and private, has been well proven in research for thirty years now. Dale Spender wrote about it in The Writing of the Sex? in 1989. Andrea Dworkin wrote about male silencing tactics in her classic text Intercourse:

"Men often react to women’s words - speaking and writing - as if they were acts of violence; sometimes men react to women’s words with violence. So we lower our voices. Women whisper, Women apologize. Women shut up. Women trivialize what we know. Women shrink. Women pull back. Most women have experienced enough dominance from men - control, violence, insult, contempt - that no threat seems empty."

Margaret Atwood wrote about men dominating classrooms in early 1980s. There have been countless studies in education and within the workplace that demonstrate the silencing of women's voices within the presence of men. The largest global study on violence against women found that it was the feminist movement that had the biggest impact on tackling the issue; much of this was accomplished with women-only spaces. This is what men need to recognise and understand.

The main reason why I believe women-only spaces are integral to the feminist movement is because the silencing of women's voices never stops. Sometimes the only way to stop the silencing is to uninvite men and that's the lesson men need to take from this. If they insist on attending, whose voices are they really silencing?

Published in the Huffington Post here.

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